Castles made of sand float to the sea....

I am a Health advisor at NHS Direct and absolutely hate it. It’s a glorified call center, nothing more nothing less. Why are we called Health Advisors? We don't advise on people health; we are not supposed to as we are not medically trained. We are call center operatives or call handlers as we once were called. I suspect the name change was an attempt to make stressed and unhappy employees as well as potential future workers feel they were doing something beneficial and helping people. In fact all we do is process demographics and isolate the more Incontrovertibly ill from the those less pressing for immediate attention. In layman’s terms those who need an ambulance and those who don't. To be even simpler who is dying and who isn't. That is all we do.


On busy days - most days are busy now - we get call after call after call re-sighting that ridiculous salutation of 'Good morning you are through to NHS Direct my name is ....I am a Health Advisor, can I start by taking the telephone number you are calling from please' and so begins the tedium. Vomiting, diarrhoea, chest pain, suicidal ideation, burnt fingers and toes, overdoses, a tingle here, a creak their, a twitch on this side, that side and a collection of sad and lonely hearts. Don't get me wrong; of course I feel for the needy, I am after all human and, prone to largely the same symptoms I here day after day. However my empathic nature or lack of is not on trial. In my eyes what is on trail is the job itself and the moronic management who think that reductionism is the way to go in the NHS, simplifying jobs down to tedious enterprise akin to factory assembly workers.

On some shifts I never get a chance to utter a word to anyone, even those sitting three feet away. This is becoming the norm and how management wants us to be performing. How many other jobs exist where you hardly chat to colleagues during an 8 hour shift? Each month we have the dreaded call review. Your line manager picks out a handful of calls with problems attached to them, not repeating a name spelling, not issuing a moronic platitude that they call empathy, 'I am sorry for your loss', being to familiar. Don't get me wrong these things are important when you miss them out entirely or don't realise you have done them. But it doesn't work that way, we are criticised for making one mistake in error even when we haven’t done it on other calls. The sick rates are shocking at best and the staff turnover rate would make shocking odds at the bookies it’s currently at 50% what does that say about the job?

We are told to meet targets of so many calls an hour. Why are me made to feel pressure about getting people processed and off the line and yet at the same time, asked to listen carefully for hidden symptoms and to make sure we understand which aspect of their situation is the most imperative were diagnosis and welfare are concerned? Therefore what is more important here? Patient health or target rates? No prizes for the correct answer. I could go on and on about the problems and the factory farming expectations of Heath Advisors...........believe me if you care, have intelligence are sensitive, then don't do it! Beware you risk losing a shard of your humanity at the very least!!!!